raw nerve

This story has blossomed from thirteen pages to thirty-two, and it keeps growing. There is so much I want to say and so much feeling in it.

This story feels like *mine* though it's taken six or so drafts to create (with still a couple more to go).

The problem is: it has gotten so close to me, speaks so powerfully to me, that I don't know how much more I can work on it. Just reading it leaves me emotionally drained. But how can I make sure it does the same to everyone (in a good way!) that reads it?

There are some polish things I need to do, and I want to work on the dialogue a bit more. But I think I'm coming to the end.

...for now. Because meanwhile, I've been looking at my old manuscript, trying to find shorter pieces to pair with this long one. When I stopped working on it this spring, it was because I knew it was the absolute best I could do, and yet nobody liked it. I had a crisis of faith.

Looking at it now, I understand why nobody liked it--it's terrible. I'd leached all the character out, and left a albeit well-structured husk.

How do I put power back into it? Can I? Do I have to start (once again) from scratch? What is the normal (draft-wise) evolution?!

This is coming on the heels of realizing how little I know about scriptwriting, too. There's so much to learn, and I'm worried; CAN I learn it?!