a cold and calculating soul

I'm a schemer. Which is sometimes a bad thing (hey, I'm cold and calculating because my moon sign is in Capricorn- don't blame me!)... but it's the only way I know how to be. And even if the feeling of control I get from planning is only an illusion, it's one that keeps me working hard day-to-day. It gives me focus and hope.

Maybe it'll do the same for you?

MY (ULTIMATE) GOAL:

Writing for television, of course!

How I decided on television writing: I've been OBSESSED with certain shows since before I can remember. First it was Sesame Street, then Scooby Doo, then Ghost Writer, then Happy Days, etc, etc, all the way up through Buffy and Angel, then Lost and Desperate Housewives, Heroes and Flipping Out, Burn Notice and Gossip Girl.

I dissect plots, characters, themes, dialogue styles *for fun.* I LOVE TELEVISION. So, of course, I was INCREDIBLY jealous of the people who actually got to write it. They get to decide and/or effect what happens on a show. A television writer gets to talk about characters and plots and dialogue and everyone is interested and has their own thoughtful insights. AND, a television writer GETS PAID FOR IT! Sounds like a dream job, the lucky bastards.

But hey, if they can do it, why not me?


MY PLANS:

So I thought about moving out to LA. There were a lot of practical reasons I couldn't- and regardless, when I first graduated college (when I should have gone- it's a huge regret), I got cold feet.

Plan B (SCRAPPED!): get my creative writing MFA. But the only schools that concentrated on theatrical writing were prohibitively expensive.
--> Plan B2 (SCRAPPED!): write a novel excerpt and get an MFA from a less expensive school.

Scrapped because: I doubted an MFA would help my writing or my career prospects. Plus, I'd be stuck in Southern Virginia or Baltimore for three years, only to come out broke as ever and without a publishing contract in hand. No thanks. AND that's assuming I could even get into a program.

Plan C: write a great novel. Get an agent. Get it published. Get my chops as a writer. When I was just starting out (with grad school as my goal) novel writing felt SO uncomfortable. But I kept beating away at my manuscript until I finished. And by then, I'd improved SO much I couldn't quit! So I started a couple more novel manuscripts (the first one isn't worth editing- it just isn't there). I've been beating away at those "new" manuscripts for three months now. Plan C still seems viable to me :)

Plan D: Television writing fellowship! A few of the studios/networks offer workshops that generally last the summer and are invaluable in terms of learning and networking. Disney's fellowship give the winner(s) employment for a year! Sure, an applicant's only got a 1% chance of getting in but... 1% is infinitely better than no chance at all!

Plan E: Save up enough/make enough money to go to LA and get a job at an agency (or, in a dreamworld, on a television show. As an assistant I mean- even my dreams aren't THAT big ;) ). I'd planned to go this month, but with the economy in the toilet... I've got to wait until there *are* entry level jobs in LA before I go out there and try to get one.

MY CURRENT WORK:

- write a (couple) great book(s)!!!!!
- find an agent for my novel(s).
- get the novel(s) published.
- everyone loves them! I get money/cachet, and tell great stories on *my* terms (no network notes on a novel!)
- my book agent recommends me to a literary agent out West for my screen/television writing, because she loves me work *that* much

- learn a lot about television writing by writing scripts- on deadlines (for the fellowships).
- win a fellowship!
- learn a lot about writing, and meet a lot of people during my summer/year as a workshopper/Disney writing assistant
- use my new knowledge/LA experience to get a full time job and move out West.

I don't have regrets anymore, just plans. And more plans and more plans and more plans. Sure, maybe I'll still fail, but at least I'm setting myself up to win :)